Leaving – and the plans that go with that

The moment of truth has arrived. Victoria and I will be in Florida tomorrow; gone for twelve days. We have done everything we can to get the house and farm ready for Brittany Wycoff to tend to in our absence and we will have to trust the Lord to use her to keep everything alive. It is no small task we are asking of her. But it is a small thing for the Lord.

We did not see Brittany at church last night but she and Mama have talked several times about what is needed and Victoria left her an additional note to ask her to water the trees and flowers a couple times over the next twelve days. It is still a little frightening to leave all we have cared for and fussed over in the keeping of someone disconnected from those concerns and all the planning and work that has brought us this far. We will trust and hope for the best and know, regardless of the outcome, it is an offer of the greatest kindness on Brittany’s part to try and take on all those cares for us.

Victoria spent the entire day cleaning the house, doing laundry and getting the animals prepped for our departure. She will be out of the  house early this morning headed to Wichita Falls for a half day training session after which she has to drive to Bowie and work until 7 pm. She and I will pack the car once she gets home but she is going to be pretty worn out.  Hopefully both of us can get the rest we need to make the drive to catch up to Mama.

We had a group meeting yesterday for the office here in Decatur. The message was not one of hope. But it was, at the very least, a wakeup call to those who have not fully bought into the notion that things are about to change dramatically. The initial emphasis of the cost saving efforts on the part of our upper management started with processes and products in mind, but having not found the necessary saving needed in those areas the focus is now squarely on people. In was not a jubilant crowd leaving the meeting as we adjourned. The next few weeks will be fraught with emotion as we find out who stays, who goes and how each group is treated in the process.

It is one of those times in life that we must plan for the worst as we hope for the best. My forward plan does not look pretty. It would be nice to have eighteen months to put the plan in place but at this point I do not think I have eighteen weeks. We’ll make it work and God will certainly supply but shame on me for not getting my act together at the first of the year when I knew this might be the actual outcome. But to my defense, I was counting on the Licensing job to carry me through. Oh, well.

Before church last night Victoria and I dropped off eggs to our Chinese friends in Decatur and we stopped to wash her car. It was in need of a more thorough washing than we were able to give it but it is cleaner than if we had not even put forth that effort. It will be less troublesome to pack if we do not have to worry over getting dirty just putting suitcases in the trunk. We are planning on having a “cart washing party” at some point in our visit with the grandkids to get a proper cleaning done.

It is amazing how much fun that can be; a drudgery for one a party for many.

Withering heat, neglect, preparing to travel

Yesterday evening it was 102®F outside without a breeze of any sort. It was most unpleasant. I did not stay out in it very long but I have been trying to get enough water to the young trees I recently planted to try and get them through the heat. If they survive the time we will be away next week they should make it for the long haul, but it is looking touch and go for some.

I am hesitant to water the garden area with the sprinkler we have set up for that purpose because nothing is growing. All the plants have burned up at this point – even the okra. It is not a big garden but the amount of water I need to get it all soaked to the point of point any good is greater than if I just carry water to specific trees and plants I need to get that water to.

I was disappointed to see the strawberries had died out. I was really hoping we would be able to keep them for a couple years. My far-fetched hope is that they are dormant and will recover once the temperatures drop to a less life-threatening level, but that may be a vain hope. On those, I will try again next year.

This year was a kind of experiment to see where we need to put the garden and how well it would produce in the more temperate environment of the Chico property. Obviously, we will have to make some adjustments but overall we had a very successful garden – until we left it for a long stay in Alaska and everything suffered a horrible death in our absence.

I have told Mama we need to make a careful choice in the future; either we will not plant a garden or we will not travel during the time we need to be tending to that garden. Of course the obvious caveat is where Grandma and Grandpa reside. Grandpa would have tended the garden in our absence but he was almost as far from it as Mama and I were through this summer. It is certainly a pitiful sight now.

Victoria is off today so she is concentrating on cleaning, laundering and packing. I started packing last night after I got moderately cleaned up. I will not have too much trouble fitting what I need into one suitcase. I was planning to bring some of my shirts on hangers but once I saw the pile of hang-up clothing Mama has set aside for us to bring I abandoned that idea and packed them into the suitcase. I do not know exactly what Victoria is bringing that will remain on hangers but it will be a challenge to find room in the car for what I have already been given.

Victoria and I are trying to find a good time to get her car washed up. The oak trees lining the driveway, under which we normally park to be in the shade, put off some kind of mist of sticky sap which covers the cars in a few days’ time. It is not hard to remove but it takes time to get the vehicles to the carwash to remove the film and dirt. And we would rather pack and travel in a fairly clean vehicle. We should be ready in plenty of time.

I am looking forward to the break from work.

Escapee, money, getting set to travel

I spent an hour or more yesterday evening putting a wire on the inside of the backyard fence in an attempt to keep Kira from getting out of the yard easily. I only had enough wire to do the portion of fence by the driveway and shop building but that is where she had been getting under the fence. It was not a wasted effort but it did not keep her in the yard. She was at the front to greet me this morning and I know Victoria had just let them out – in the back yard. Oh, well. We will keep trying because she will certainly keep trying.

Mama has been enjoying her time with the grandkids but I had to fuss at her a little last night because she has spent over $100 on eating out in the few days she has been there. I let her know we were very short of cash before she flew out but I knew it would not do anything more than slow her down a little.

I explained that I still need money for gas to get there and back and the money she spent on fast food could have bought a lot of groceries but it was a moot point. Like I have always told my children when it comes to money, you can only spend it once – so make it count. Mama’s excuse for the eating out was “they don’t get to do it very often.” Well, neither will we.

We’ll make it there and back but at some point in the very near future we will have to come to grips with a new paradigm; one that may require us to go to our children for advice on how to effectively live on less.  It is not a frightening proposition because I can still work somewhere, but it will require a serious adjustment; perhaps long overdue for both me and Mama.

Victoria and I are trying to get things set up around the house so that Brittany Wycoff can handle the house and the animals in our absence. When you consider the chickens, the pigs, the dogs and the plants that have to be cared for it is a pretty big task for someone unused to the routine. We are buying feed and putting things in central locations so everything necessary is easy to locate.

I am making sure things are in proper working order. For instance, I had to make a repair to the garage door yesterday. Sam had gone into the garage to rest and as I ran him out he stepped on the sensor for the automatic mechanism for the garage door. It was a pretty quick repair but it is the little things – like the automatic opener not working – that can cause the biggest consternation to a visitor.

I got the ice maker working again and we are cleaning out the refrigerator – making the pigs and dogs very happy. They do not know what is going on but they love the food we are discarding. I think the pigs like moldy bread better than fresh bread and the dogs like any meat we give them regardless of how “aged” it is.

That is not saying much when you look at what they continually drag into the yard.

No new arrivals, weekend updates, job updates

I have not heard yet this morning but as of last night Cori was still having strong contractions but none consistent enough to accomplish the birth of Savanah. We are all very anxious to meet the little one – Cori most of all.

Mama has been enjoying her time there. As it is when she is with the grandchildren I seem to be an afterthought. She has always told me how accomplished she is in multi-tasking, but I tend to see things a little differently when she is occupied as she is at the moment. I don’t mind, it is as it should be. Besides I have plenty to do and can pretty effectively take care of myself.

Speaking of plenty to do, I did very little on Saturday. It was our first official 100® day of the summer and it was dead still. I did not have the energy to venture out until late in the day when I went out to weed eat along the fence line. I lasted about an hour with the weed eater – about normal for me – but I was completely drenched before is stopped. The end result was nice. It should last a few weeks since nothing is growing right now.

I watered the plants Mama and I just put in the flowerbeds in front of the house and watered the trees I am struggling to keep hydrated through these sweltering months. So far it looks like we will have success with most of them; far better than we had in Bowie. But there are a couple I will not be able to keep alive; especially when we are anticipating being gone for all of next week without the prospect of rain during that time. All I can do is water heavily before we leave Friday morning and hope for the best.

Kira has been finding her way out of the back yard every time we put her out so I will have to see if I can make that escape more challenging for her as I attempt to repair the fence this evening. Until this morning she has stayed close to home  but Victoria texted me to tell me she was gone somewhere with Sam and she could not call her up before she left for work.

The good news is that most everyone who frequents the property next to us knows her – they especially know the big dogs – so she is in no particular danger there. It is just upsetting that the wanderlust is so strong in her and Sam. We have no idea where the two of them go but they are always gone for several hours before returning, and they are always a mess when they get back. So far Kobe has not offered to leave the yard, but it could be only a matter of time. Leaving them in someone else’s care for the time we are gone and the ease with which Kira has been getting out does not particularly thrill Victoria.

As far as things at work are progressing, it is looking more and more certain that I will not be employed with ConocoPhillips through the end of the year. Nothing has been formally announced but the indications are getting more certain that my current job will be eliminated as my group of employees is rolled into another group. I had to turn into my boss an organizational chart with that very assignment of my group. My position was not part of the new organization.

We talked to our boss this morning about the tax implications of getting laid off at the end of the year and the severance package being applied to this year’s earnings – essentially forcing taxes to be paid on a year and a half of earnings in the current tax year. The management wants the write off to come this year and those of us caught in the reorganization will just have to deal with it. Not that it is a horrible thing to get the severance package but it does have consequences for each of us who will have to deal with it.

It is a sad way to end a very good job with a very good company.

Mama/Grammy, work, tiny visitors

I texted Cori yesterday after Mama confirmed that she was safely on her connection to Pensacola; “Get ready. Here she comes!” Cori responded that Blake refused to eat breakfast that morning because Grammy had promised to take him out to eat for his birthday – which was this week. Cori ended the text to me with; “So it begins.” I do not know how chaotic their normal schedule is at Cori’s home but it goes without saying that Grammy adds a whole new dynamic. 

Mama and I will celebrate 33 years together this year and she has been the delight of my life for all that time. I do not know what we will do to celebrate our anniversary but the date will come while we are there with Cori and the kids. I am sure we will figure something out but with finances being the way they are it will not be extravagant. Fortunately, it does not take much to make Mama happy.

I have been careful to let Mama know that we do not have money to do much more than get there and enjoy the visit but I know Mama pretty well and the best I can hope for is to slow her down enough to keep the finances manageable. I do feel, with things like they are at the moment at work, that we need to start ordering our finances as though we did not have my current income. We may very well need to adjust to that budget very soon – and very quickly.

It puts me in one of those uncertain situations where I have to hope for the best and plan for the worst. That is not a bad thing if you consider the slowing economy, global turmoil and the pending financial crisis. It is actually a very helpful exercise in budgeting if we really take it seriously; both me and Mama- along with Victoria, Grandma and Grandpa, etc.

I think of a portion of one line in the song “I’ve Got a mansion” that says, “I’m not discouraged, I’m Heaven bound. I’m just a pilgrim, in search of a city.” Or the lyrics, “This world is not my home, I’m just a’pass’n through”. My hope is not here. My home is not here. Yet, all I know is here. The rest is a step of faith. It should be kind of fun to see how all this plays out.

I was a little disappointed that what was supposed to be a confidential discussion with my direct reports on Wednesday afternoon went out to the masses even before we finished the discussion. I was prepared for that to happen so I did not give out any information that was not ready for general distribution, but I was still disappointed. It is only one person who behaves in that way but one is always enough to keep things unnecessarily stirred up.

I will have to refill the humming bird feeders this evening. From what I can tell we have three pairs that eat at them all day long. I can only assume that there is a nest near the house but I could not tell you where. I do know that it is quite fun to see them flit about and then hover over the feeder as they take a sip of the nectar. None of them is bigger than my thumb and at times it is difficult to keep them in sight as they move about. It is truly erratic – and impressively fast.

Hopefully we can keep them fed until they head back south later this year.

Mama’s flight, news trickling in, Walter

Mama and I were up at 3 a.m. to get her and her luggage loaded in the van and taken to DFW for a 5:30 flight. It was a very short night especially since I did not feel well last night. After Mama and I had checked the chicken coop to ensure it was set up for Victoria in the morning I got back to the house and got very light headed and nauseous. I lay down on the bed and broke out in a heavy sweat. Fortunately that only lasted a few minutes but the malaise it left me in continued through church. It abated somewhat as I lay in bad while Mama finished her last minute packing. It is gone this morning. I have no idea what caused it.

We got to the airport in plenty of time. It always surprises me how many people are traveling at that time of the morning. I helped Mama get checked in and watched her go into the screening area, then headed out. I ended up getting to the office about a half hour earlier than normal. Not too bad except for the five hour night that preceded it.

Mama is fired up. She gets an extra week with the grandkids, an extra week to help Cori in the final stretch, an extra week to finagle trips to the beach – she will be sunburned before I get there. She will get to Pensacola before 10 a.m. so she will have the opportunity to go down for a nap with the kids. Her only real obstacle is that her flight arrives in Houston at 6:30 in one terminal and departs Houston at 7 a.m. from a different terminal. If she makes that, she will be okay. I am waiting to hear that she made that connection.

I should hear more today about the timing of the layoffs ahead. Our boss was in Houston yesterday for several meetings, one of which is called a “leveling session”; an interactive meeting where managers get together and rate their groups (on and individual basis) against one another for ranking and potential financial compensation adjustments.

It happens every year but it is more common to take place at the end of the year. As it turns out, for many employees this will be the end of the year. I am pretty sure this session included a discussion of those employees and contractors we could let go and those we would like to keep. I expect the final tally by the end of next month and I was sure hoping I would be in a Licensing position so that I did not have to deal with letting anyone go; unfortunately it is not going to work out that way.

The news continues to trickle in and we continue to make adjustments in our ongoing efforts to quell the fears of our respective staff members while looking ahead to our own vulnerable positions. It is a delicate balance of what we know at this point and what we suspect will happen at some future point. Fortunately, many of the people around me have been through something similar in the past. Though we do not know how things will play out, we have all experienced the process play out. That helps a little – at least we know not to take it personally.

Maggie and Aaron are getting to really enjoy Walter. Maggie has told us that he goes to bed at about 9 pm and wakes at 1 a.m. and 5 a.m., then sleeps through to 9 a.m. That is a good schedule for one just over two weeks old. It gives Maggie time to put Cathryn to bed and get her up in the morning between taking care of her little brother.

Mama could only have wished for such an easy child.

Yard work, Mama’s on the road again, not so good news

Mama and I worked in the yard last night for several hours – after we cleaned the chicken coop and I mowed inside all the fence line on our little ten acres. It was fairly late when we put up the tools and came inside to cool off but Mama was delighted with the planting and weeding that we had done. I have to admit, things looked a good deal better than when we started.  

We also hooked up a hose to water the plantings in front of the house that will reach the trees planted in the backyard that I am trying to save in this drought. It was a productive evening but by the time Mama finally sat down in the house her back was hurting. I think she will be better this morning as she and Victoria clean the house and Mama finalizes her packing but I will wait for the update sometime later.

Tomorrow morning I will – Lord willing – deliver Mama to the airport very early. Her flight leaves here at 5:30 a.m. It is a little inconvenient for us but it will allow Mama to arrive in Pensacola before 10 a.m. local time and I should arrive a little earlier than normal at the office. Getting it all out of the way early works for me.

Savanah is still feeling comfortable enough where she is at the moment although her mommy is ready to have her in her arms as opposed to her belly. We have to trust the Lord on those things but I do not think Mama will be there many days before she and Savanah get introduced. I am praying that Mama being there will be a help to Cori and that she will really rest over the next couple days as God finishes His work on little Savanah.

Although we were not expecting rain for many days, it is raining now; one of those summer showers that give us a half inch or better in twenty minutes. It is a very pleasant albeit unexpected delight. For some reason the plants almost always do better when watered by rain than any other method. Even though we have well water – no chemicals added – to use on our plants, they respond far better to a rain shower.

I got a note from the Licensing Manager this morning in which he let me know that the prospect of being hired by him is rapidly diminishing. The longer the delay in getting Licensing help scheduled for the plant startup in southern Louisiana, the less opportunity there is for me to participate in that startup since there will be personnel available to take on that role by the end of the year. That is not a definite dismissal, but it makes the prospect of getting that job a very remote one.

I let my boss know and we will see what opportunities present themselves over the following weeks but I will have to focus on the very real possibility that I will be jobless by the end of the year.