Trace and the truck, weather changes, coaching

While we were in Kansas we left the truck for Trace and Krystal to use. They had a better weekend with it this time. We dropped it off to him on Thursday evening since we were leaving Friday afternoon. I am not sure what they used it for over the weekend, but I know they have been without a vehicle, so I expect there was some catching up to do with all the little things we take for granted when they are merely an inconvenience; grocery store runs, for example. We had not made any plans to get the truck back, but I was going to need it Monday morning. Perhaps in anticipation of the question, Trace called while we were on the drive home – about three hours out. We all agreed that it would be good if they brought the truck to the farm after they got out of church Sunday evening. We would end up arriving about the same time if all things worked out as expected. And they did.

As we were pulling up to 1810 from Fortenbury Road, Trace drove past. He and Victoria must have made eye contact, because she laughed and told me that the truck that just passed us was our truck. Trace must have made the connection because he stopped on the shoulder of the road. I was not thinking that far ahead but it made sense for me to let Mama and Victoria take the Sequoia home while I took Trace and the boys home. Krystal was home sick. So, that’s what we did. But first, I had to take them to Walmart to buy a loaf of bread. We talked on the way home and I asked if Trace was looking for work or if he was happy with what he was currently doing – working for Norman. He let me know that he really needed something more reliable, but they were getting by for the moment. I got his permission to start asking around with some of my contacts. We’ll see what the Lord does. I am not sure of all the issues Trace is dealing with or his history, someday he might tell me, but I do understand what it is to struggle to provide for a growing family. Right now, Mama and I are in a position where we can help a little and we would foolish not to do what we can for them.

We got a lot of wind and a little rain yesterday morning. Along with the storms that blew in we got overnight temperatures in the sixties. That was a pleasant change. It will still get into the nineties today, but the daytime high temperatures will stay below 100° F. That will also provide a welcome respite from the extreme heat. It will not last long, but we will enjoy it while we have it.

Mama and I had our final coaching session with Thresa last night. It was a quickfire session. Mama tried to drive as I took notes but that did not end up working out so well. I did the best I could to keep up as we flew through Michigan, Arkansas and Florida. Theresa helped us make some links to the county websites we will need in the future and took time to show us how to research the houses available on lists that are less well known. It was encouraging. Even Mama felt like she could figure it out as we work through the lists we tagged for future reference. Theresa insisted that we contact her when we find a deal we are serious about – before we buy it. She also insisted that we stay in touch. We have all her contact information and she admonished us to use her insights whenever the need arises in the future. Now it is up to Mama and me to keep going and eventually, with the Lord’s help, make this business work.

Boy do we need it to work. We are getting bombarded with medical bills from her surgery. From what we can gather at this point, we will owe close to $15,000. Fortunately for us, God has not run out of money, nor is He short on the resources we will need to help us get through this. That’s encouraging, because in October we have to do it all over again.

One year old

The entire weekend was devoted to the twins and their first birthday. Andrew’s brother Peter and their mother came down from New Jersey to participate in the event. We all had a great time. When Mama and I go to Brittany’s house Friday evening, the girls were only a few minutes away from being put to bed. Brittany had kept them up a little longer than usual waiting on us to arrive because she knew Mama would not rest well until she had seen the babies. Since we had been with them only a week ago, they both dived right into our arms. Sophia into my arms and Zoe into Victoria’s arms. Sophia has a special attraction to me – she always has. Mama got one of them once she was safely settled into a chair in the living room. From that point on, through the remainder of the weekend, every time I entered a room, Sophia would struggle to reach me. The only caveat was that as my whiskers grew, she was none too pleased by my kisses. Sunday morning, after I had shaved, I kissed her cheek. There was only a moment of hesitancy before she leaned into my face for me to kiss her again.

The birthday party was Saturday morning. Brittany had the event scheduled for 10 am. That was a very good move. Two neighbor families came and several friends. It was not a large gathering, but it filled the house with fifteen or so adults and seven or eight children. We had brunch – breakfast casseroles and fruit followed by cupcakes. One of the invited guests was Grandma June. She was an interesting person. She asked me if I would move our vehicle and park it behind hers. She had parked across the street on the main thoroughfare into the neighborhood. She explained to me that any errant driver would now hit my vehicle and spare hers any damage. Never mind that we had to make a 350-mile trip to get home. Her vehicle would escape any damage if mine were hit. Brittany explained that that in not an unusual thought for her. Late that afternoon she offered to swap husbands with Mama. Fortunately, Mama did not accept her very generous offer.

The twins were given smash cakes to celebrate with, but it took them few minutes to figure out the game. Once they did, they made Brittany proud. At one point a guest baby was allowed to help them smash the cakes. She did so with relish. Obviously, she knew a bit more about the process than the Zoe and Sophia. We also played a traditional Korean game of having the babies crawl to the center of the room where a selection of items was placed for them to choose from. A gavel, a stethoscope, a microphone, a football, a Bible, a $20 bill and a roll of yarn. The idea behind the game was that the choice they made of an item from the mix would foretell their later profession in life. Both of the girls chose the shiny microphone at first but then later gravitated to other items. Sophia ended up playing with the stethoscope and Zoe played with the ball. Both abandoned their choices when someone activated the microphone and it began to belt out a song from the movie, Frozen.

I made a soup for lunch – for those of us who wanted something more like an afternoon meal. Later that evening we went to a Korean restaurant for dinner. The food was delicious. The portions were huge. We took home four containers full of leftovers. (Which we ate for lunch on Sunday.) We were late getting the girls to bed and even later getting ourselves to bed. Which made for a rushed morning Sunday morning because we had to be at church at 9 am to attend the early service. Very contemporary. More like participating in a performance and listening to a motivational speaker. Nothing bad, just nothing filling. My expectation is that once Brittany and Andrew get hungry for the things of God, they will find another church. But they are safe for now.

The trip home was uneventful – after we found our way back onto the interstate. This morning, Brittany will be on her own with the twins again. Not a bad thing. Just a little sad.

Moving all of us, packing, perception

I failed to mention in my blog yesterday that before Danial began his sermon/lesson Wednesday night he had all the people in the front of the church move to the back of the church. His reason for doing so was because he wanted to condense the crowd. It makes broadcasting a message and making eye contact easier when the crowd is more condensed; much more so after the move than when we started out. It brings the speaker closer to the hearers. It changed the atmosphere of the service in a good way. The reason he asked the folks in the front to move to the back is that it is nearly impossible to get those who always sit in the back to move to the front. Bro. Danial moved to the back of the auditorium also, using a music stand for his pulpit, and moving about as he preached. It was a great service. He also issued a challenge toward the end of his message. Why is it that when the Pastor opens for service for testimonies, it takes so long for someone to stand? And why do the same people take the opportunity almost every time while others rarely if ever do? Do we not all have something to praise the Lord for? Something recent? It was a perfect challenge based on the sermon dealing with the names of God – and His continual blessings on us.

Mama and Victoria are packing the Sequoia this morning. I drove Victoria’s car to work because I took the truck to Trace last night. His van is still in the shop getting the transmission replaced and will not be ready until sometime late next week. After all the effort he went through last weekend getting tires replaced on the truck, I thought it only right to let him enjoy the rewards of that labor while Mama, Victoria and I are with Andrew and Brittany. I am working only a half day today, so we will hopefully leave about 1 pm. Another six-hour drive each way. Fortunately, Mama and I love to travel.

Mama reminded me yesterday that Andrew’s mother and brother will be at Brittany’s also. I had forgotten for some reason. This is, in Korean terms, one of the most important birthdays in the life of their children. A tradition stemming from the time when many children did not make it to their first birthday. It will be fun to see them again. Andrew’s mother, who has been in the United States for more than thirty years does not speak much English at all. I am not entirely sure how that is possible other than the fact that she just never had the desire to learn. She is a very quiet person, so I suppose she has not felt the need to interact outside of the group who shares her language. I cannot imagine a life like that, but she seems content. I worry for my trees during our absence. It will be Sunday night – probably late – when they will be watered again. But they can be replaced if necessary.

I was listening to a podcast called EconTalk yesterday and the guest, Teppo Felin, was talking about perception. It was a fascinating discussion. I spend a good deal of time in one course I teach talking about our ability to be so focused that we lose sight of many things around us. Often missing very important things. A focus leading to a blindness. Teppo Felin quoted someone, I did not catch a name, but I caught the thought.  On perception: The universe is full of dots. Connect the right ones and you can draw anything. The important question in not whether the dots you chose are really there, but why you chose to ignore all the other dots.

Why do we see what we do see and not see what we do not see? The host and guest referenced a short video I have seen multiple times where we the observers are asked to count the number of times a team of players passes the basketball within their group. There are two groups doing the same activity, so you have to focus. Meanwhile, a person dressed in a gorilla suit walks into the group, dances around a bit and then walks off camera. Ninety percent of those watching, counting the passes, do not see the gorilla. I have been in a room where the video was played and explained and when the video was replayed, and the gorilla was seen, many in the room swore that they were watching a different video. After all, how could they have missed something so obvious?

My caution, especially to myself, stop, look, listen. Be in the moment. You will enjoy the journey that much more if you are not fixated on singular issues; most of which would have sorted themselves out without your expenditure of emotional energy. So, this weekend, it is all about Zoe and Sophia. And by extension, their parents (our children).

I promise I will try to focus more broadly.

What’s in a name, too dry

Last night at church, Bro Danial preached/taught on some of the names of God. Some of the information he got from a series of lessons we had in FBI and some were added through internet searches. All the names of God, when studied in parallel, add personality and dimension to the character of God and allow us to know Him more intimately. No one name can do that. That is why the Bible gives us so many names we can call God by; each emphasizing a different aspect of His willingness to interact with us – His children. Sometimes in pleasant ways - in blessings. Sometimes in painful ways – in trails and chastisement. It was a good lesson. A reminder that we too often do not give God enough credit (praise) for all He does for us. Both seen and unseen.

The lesson reminded me of a name I heard recently, Abcde. Seriously. Pronounced Ab-sa-dee. The first question is, why would a parent give a child a name that is certain to be problematic throughout their life? It may seem cute at birth, but the effect over a lifetime would be less than cute. Another that popped into my mind was La-a. Pronounced La -dash -uh. I would be curious to know just how many times the owner of that moniker had to tell someone how to pronounce it as a name. By definition, a “hyphen joins two or more words together while a dash separates words into parenthetical statements”. But La-hyphen-uh would be even more confusing. On the hand, a three-paragraph name would be more in line with a name given in the language of the Ents – the “tree herders” of Tolkien fame. (Note the hyphen and dash used in the preceding sentence.) I thank the Lord my parents picked a recognizable Bible name to label me. Although when I state my name in introductions people hear Kent, Ken, Ben and the like. The good part is my name is easy to spell out for those who misheard. My parents could have named me Dodo or Ichabod – both Bible names. But I would have had to repeat then just about as often as my given name over the course of a lifetime.

Very early on in the course of our engagement I changed Mama’s name. Or, at least, I gave her a pet name that has stuck with her over all these years. I think she is more apt to answer to my name for her than to her given name – especially when I say it. Early on in our courtship, a friend of ours heard me call Mama by her pet name and he later used that name to address her. She was none too pleased, and she let him know. It was, and still is to her, a term of endearment. Now, 36+ years later it would not be as offensive to her, but I am the one who calls her by that name; very few others know or use it. I think it still rankles Grandma when I use it. I think it still lets Mama know how dearly I love her.

On the farm front, the number of trees I will likely lose this year is climbing. Neither of the peach trees is responding positively to the care we are giving them. The miniature in the garden is almost surely a lost cause. The large one in the back yard is very nearly dead – or going dormant. I am not sure which. Both of the plum trees in the garden are looking bad. All of them will be cared for through the remainder of the year to see if they will come back to life in the Spring of next year. The blackberry bushes are drying up no matter how much water I give them. Again, I will not know until Spring if there is any life remaining in them. But it is looking doubtful. At this point, the only plants doing well are the thorn trees and the cactus. And even they are starting to show signs of heat stress. One year when we lived in Bowie, even the cactus shriveled up and went dormant. We are not there yet but we are only in late July. We may get there soon.

Hopefully, the wells hold out through the drought.

Little gains, little setbacks

Mama and I – mostly I – tested out the internet connection at the house last night. As it relates to our business, it will be adequate for us. If I can get Mama to learn the process for accessing the information via the internet, we should be able to invest considerably more time in our research. In just a few minutes last night, I was able to find a property that is worth a little further research. What I cannot seem to do is find an auction that is worth going to that I can coordinate with the vacation I have available. And it feels like time is running out. Oh, well. Patience is often its own reward and we have had to exercise that emotional muscle extensively over the past few months.

Our coaching session with Theresa was very informative. She has been a valuable asset to Mama and me in our research. Next Monday will be our last session with her but she admonished us to run our first deal by her, so she can look it over with us even if the paid sessions are completed. We have one more session with her because she set us a session on the day of Mama’s surgery. When we did not show up for that session, she ticked off that appointment as a “no show.” She forgot what was going on in our lives on that particular Monday – but she restored the hour to our account when we reminded her. We have managed to stretch the ten sessions out over five months, but in doing so, we have gotten to explore more options because we have had the time to become proficient in our research in several states through those extended pauses. Some of those who started the training when we did have told us that their entire ten week coaching focus was in only one area of one state. Theresa was more accommodating toward us. I think, in the long run, it will serve us well.

Mama has had several good nights of sleep lately. Me, not so much. I am not sure how it happened, but I caused some injury to my left shoulder while we were in Victoria. It may be because I slept on the floor that night, but we are not sure. I have a painful knot at the base of the deltoid in my left shoulder. It has caused some serious interruption to my nights since we got home. It does not seem to limit my activity, but it has certainly limited my range of motion in that shoulder. The pain is a deep, constant bone ache accompanied by the inability to get comfortable no matter what position I choose. This too shall pass, but not before we spend the weekend with Brittany, Andrew and the twins. At their house, I typically sleep on the floor because the bed is too soft for me. I’m not sure how that is going to work out.

Mama and I talked about getting the boy goats weathered (emasculating them) but when she called the vet the price was pretty high. It seems we have waited too long, and the surgery required is more extensive than we thought. If we could have done the procedure we would have been able to run them with the girl goats without the concern of them interbreeding, but alas, they will remain fully equipped as males and Mama and I will have to deal with the complications that brings. As is true in any negotiation or sale, price solves everything. We just have to accept the fact that they are not going to bring us much money when we sell them, but we cannot keep them. If Mama will allow, we could always eat them.

I love that part of running a farm.

The aftermath

I got a good look at the trees and bushes last night. The last time I got to water them was Friday evening. The Saturday and Sunday we were gone the temperatures were 106° F and 110° F respectively. Because we missed those two evenings of watering I am afraid I will lose the dwarf Peach tree I have in the garden. I will also lose one of the two plum trees in the garden. I have been unable to get it to come back to full strength since one of our cows got into the garden and ate all its leaves last spring. Other than that, I am fairly confident that we will be able to save the rest of the trees and bushes. However, when we are out of town this weekend, I may have to ask Brittany Wycoff to water for me on the evenings she will be staying at the farm. I do not think they can survive another long, hot weekend without help.

Also, while we were gone, one of the older chickens succumbed to the heat and died. The problem is that it died under the coop building. I will have to rig something up this evening to reach the carcass and get it removed. It is putting off quite a smell. I did not get it last night because Mama and I were coming to the office and I did not want to lay in the yuk of the coop yard and stretch myself under the building to try and drag the carcass out. Mama reluctantly granted permission to delay the extraction, but I will not be able to put it off any longer than today. The forecast for this coming weekend is for temperature to barely reach the 100° F mark. That should make enough of a difference that I will not stress over the stress the weather will put on the plants we are struggling to keep alive through this summer. Ultimately, if I lose any of these plants, they can be replaced. It is just a pain to have to start over when we have invested so much time to get the trees and plants established.

It almost looked like it was going to rain yesterday evening. The skies have been very overcast. Almost dirty looking. Yesterday evening, it clouded up to the point that you could almost smell rain in the air. Almost. That lasted for about three hours then things cleared off, the clouds dispersed, and the wind died away. The humidity has hovered at 35-40%. Not exactly the atmosphere where rain would be expected. The dewpoint – the temperature at which dew will form – is somewhere about 65° F. Since our overnight temperatures are in the high seventies and low eighties, we have been without even a morning dew for several weeks. Things are dry. One of the old-timers around here told me recently. “It’ll rain. Eventually. It always does.” And as my friends would have said years ago, “True that!”

Since these drought situations often require a severe atmospheric condition to get resolved, I have been watching the Atlantic radar for signs of a tropical storm or hurricane, but nothing yet. Despite the frantic predictions of the alarmists. No, I would much prefer a slow moving gentle rain like we got in West Virginia, but we are a little far south for that. Or the predictable afternoon shower, we used to get when I was growing up in Houston. But we area not in the right area for that either. Oh, well. We will take what we get and supplement water to the plants as long as we are able.

The weather is not the only area in our lives where we need a big solution right now. Right away, if possible. Fortunately, we have a big God.

Western Hills, Trace and the truck

Friday evening after work, I dropped off the truck at Trace’s, so he and Krystal could use it for the weekend while Mama, Victoria and I traveled to parts south. I drove straight to their house from work and Victoria picked me up on her way home. I visited for about fifteen minutes with Krystal and the boys while I waited on Victoria. Once we got home, I started on the farm chores while Mama and Victoria began packing for the overnight trip we were making to Victoria, TX to visit Western Hills Baptist Church for their 30 Year Anniversary. It was the first extended road trip for Mama since her surgery, so there was quite a bit of thought put into where and how to place her in the vehicle.

The trip to Victoria was an uneventful six hours on the road. We had to stop fairly regularly so Mama could stretch or bend depending on the pain she was having from periods of idleness as we traveled. There was not much ground we covered that was unfamiliar territory to us as the trek brought back a lot of memories. We unpacked the car at the hous

e of a friend from the church, took her to dinner and then walked around the mall for an hour or so. At least, Victoria and I walked around the mall. Mama and Cindy shopped at Hallmark while Victoria and I got some steps in. We had eaten at Olive Garden and needed to walk the food down a bit.

Sunday morning, we got to surprise the folks at church. Pastor and Wilma Parish had no idea we were coming – nor did anyone else except our host and Martha Robinson, who had sent out the letters of invitation. It was a wonderful reunion. As best we can remember, it was fourteen years ago that we moved from Victoria, TX to New Jersey. That is how long it has been since Victoria has been back to Victoria, TX. Lots of hugs. Lots of catching up. Lots of reminiscing. I believe it is the one church that Mama and I could happily return to. Don’t get me wrong. We have church friends in all the churches we have attended over the years – especially West Virginia and New Jersey – but Western Hills is special to us both. Partly because of the way we were so desperately needed but mostly because of the way we fit in that body of believers.

There was a short video shown of pictures that had been taken over the years. We were in so many of them. The kids were so young. Some of the pictures were of those we remember so well who have now gone on to Heaven. Some have moved on to other areas of the United States and the world. Many are still there. Much older. Like I said, so many memories. We enjoyed lunch at the church after the service. It gave us a lot more time to visit. But like all such moments, the time came when we had to head home, and about 2:30 pm we had said our final farewells and headed back north.

It was on the way home that Trace called me to let me know how things had gone with the truck. As Trace tells it, they were headed somewhere Saturday evening and a motorist flagged them down, letting him know that the front tire was low. He pulled off the road and, sure enough, the tire was nearly flat. He headed back home and once there discovered that both of the front tires were losing air. Now he had a problem. One flat is manageable as long as there is a spare. Two is more than most vehicles are equipped for. He called for help from family and was told he would have to wait. So, he called around Sunday morning and was not able to find a shop that was open. However, online there was a tire shop that advertised being open seven days a week. The caveat. There was not a phone number provided.

So, he called a friend who took him to the shop to investigate in person. Sure enough, they were open and had two mismatched used tires that would fit the truck. He bought them both. Managed to get enough air in the tires on the truck to get the truck to the shop and was finally back home late Sunday evening. What they discovered was that the tread had separated on the tires. The mechanic on duty told Trace that he has seen an increase in that problem with the temperatures as high as they have been recently. He felt bad about the whole incident. I felt bad to have put him through such an ordeal, but both of us were grateful to have the truck operational.

Somewhere along the way, the Lord will give us opportunity to repay the effort spent on our behalf.