Compatible levels of insanity

Yesterday one of my coworkers began talking about his wife – in a lovingly disapproving manner – about her insistence that he take time off to attend the first birthday of a niece. He presented the hypothesis that all women are insane, thought to widely varying levels of insanity. He then went on to speculate that the successful marriages are the ones where the man has not married above his ability to tolerate the insanity of the woman he married.
I countered that if his hypothesis is true then the same argument must be plausible for the female side of the equation – possible more so, in that the successful marriages are the ones in which the woman has not married above her ability to tolerate her husband’s level of insanity. Therefore, we both concluded that the best marriages are those in which there are compatible levels of insanity and a mutual tolerance one for the other.
In actuality, that theory is not too far from life in practice. I cannot begin to count the number of times my children have seen me struggle to understand when one of two completely inconsequential matters seem so significantly better to their mother than the other. For instance, what tie I wear, what shoes she wears, whether or not her hair should be fixed one way or another, or whether a daughter should wear the nude or the tan pantyhose.
Insanity might not be the best choice of words to express the thought, but it conveys the meaning pretty well. When my pastor asked me about Mama’s recent trip to Florida, one I was not totally in favor of, I explained that I will have an easier time making up for the loss in income than I would in making amends for the disappointment it would bring to my home to not have allowed her travel. My disapproval is less important than her disappointment. It has worked successfully that way for many years. I do not have to agree, I just have to go along – regardless of how unimportant, how poorly timed or how insane it looks to me. If it is that important to her, I will try to make it happen regardless of my understanding, let alone approval.
That may border on insanity, but it works.