Sickness, Chicken soup, Leaks

Maggie, Victoria and Mama have been sick for several days now. Maggie started the cycle about ten days ago and Victoria quickly followed. I think Maggie might have gotten the bug from Seth who was diagnosed with the flu about two weeks ago. He has since recovered, but the rest of my household has not. All the ladies in my home missed church in the morning and only Maggie felt up to going in the evening.


It has been some time since either Mama or I were sick so she spends most of the day shivering and feeling guilty. During the times that she feels better, she does some of the regular chores but her endurance is limited, Victoria has inherited my cough (loud and inescapably annoying) and even the dog has forsaken her choosing to sleep with Chase instead. Things are getting better slowly but it may be several more days to full recovery for all who do not feel well.

The weather is not helping. After a weekend in the seventies a cold front is bearing down on us with blistering winds and bone chilling temperatures. During the day the temperature is supposed to drop into the teens and be near zero tonight with freezing rain turning to snow. The general trend is predicted to continue for several days, which may slow the recovery of those suffering from colds and upper respiratory issues in many homes here in Amarillo – mine included.

On Friday I took the day off (since Mama was so sick) to meet a tile man who was scheduled to look at our leaking shower. I used the opportunity to make a large pot of chicken soup. It did wonders for Victoria in every area but her persistent cough. We ate on it for several days. It is still a wonder to me how a simple home remedy like that works so well.

As for the tile man, he discovered several cracks in the grout at the base of our shower enclosure, but he was not convinced that that was the source of the leak. He is leaning toward a plumbing problem. The plumber continues to blame the tile man. Meanwhile we are without a shower. The only thing that made Sunday tolerable is that the girls did not have to get ready for church as they normally would have. Seth, Chase and I were early for both services as a result. We could have made it work but we are definitely spoiled to having more than one bathroom in the house.

Chase starts his new school today. I think he is excited about it.

Dealing with pregnancies, Elderberries, Chase’s schooling

Three of the ladies who are “direct reports”, that is, they are employees of the company who report directly to me, are dealing with pregnancies. One is due to deliver in the next six weeks and is dragging out her departure for maternity leave as possible – a fact I appreciate. One has a daughter who is pregnant for the first time after over seven years of trying to conceive. The third just got back from seeing her first grandchild be born to her son and daughter-in-law, which turned out to be a complicated and frightening process. The baby is now fine, but it was touch and go for the first several days.


Both of the first-child situations have an older child in the home from a previous marriage which, within the respective homes, makes the pregnancies less life changing; never the less, each is very significant. It is only for the one that I have had to make serious adjustments to personnel to backfill the position. Thankfully we were able to find a very good young lady to cover the job until the new mom returns in eight weeks or so.

What seems odd is that none of the ladies mind talking to me about it. With the babies we have had and with the tiny ones we have taken into our home, it is a comfortable subject to me also. Perhaps that is why the discussions do not feel the least bit strained; that and the fact that Mama and I are truly missing having little ones around. Couple that with the knowledge that these ladies know I pray for them, they keep me well informed so that I can pray effectively.

I gave my boss some of the elderberry syrup I had prepared for our home use and it worked very well for him. He has been dealing with bronchitis for over a month and I know he was under a doctor’s care, but things did not seem to be getting better. His was like the infections I used to get before I started keeping my head covered. Anyway, the remedy was so effective that he has ordered more of the dried elderberries so he can make up his own batches – and he is telling everyone about it.

We stayed after church last night to look over the material used in the school at our church. Mama and Chase were very impressed. Chase even thought that the material as a whole will be challenging to him as he progresses through the curriculum. From my standpoint, I have not felt that we were getting our money’s worth out of the school he has been attending, but I have prayed about it and said very little to hint at my thoughts for fear of influencing the decision I knew was coming.

It was easily decided to move Chase into the school at our church, but the issue of timing was of some concern. It is not difficult to make the transition from an academic or a record tracking basis but there are many things about the school where Chase is going that he will miss. He has a great attitude about the whole transition and I pray that that attitude endures as we tackle the challenges ahead. We are jumping in almost immediately.

Maybe we should have started here, but I leaned on the side of meeting more than his academic needs in the transition to Texas. That plan failed as the basketball season progressed, but it tested Chase’s character – and he came through fine.

Looks like he will probably be my most bounced around child as we progress through this year into the next.

No snow, the playa lakes, basketball disappointments

With this week flying by, January is almost over and it looks to be another very fast year. I looked at the weather report this morning for our old habitat in the Northeast. Thought it is below freezing here with a fifteen mile per hour wind, it is dry – no snow. Not so for our friends in New Jersey. It gives me a very clear understanding of why my father moved us to Texas from Indiana so many years ago.


He had always told us that the primary reason was that he was tired of shoveling snow at all hours of the night when he was called in to the hospital. I can now relate somewhat. It is frustrating to get up at 3 a.m. and have to work a half hour or more to get out of the driveway onto roads that are not nearly clean enough to be driving on, knowing that Mama and the kids will have to deal with the rest of the mess when they get up. I love the snow, but it is better from a distance.

Mama was saying last night that she wonders what the spring and summer will be like here and I am curious also. Scattered across this area of Texas are pools of water called playa lakes. Playa is the Spanish word for beach and it is easy to see how they got their name. They are reservoirs of water made by catching rain and snow runoff into naturally occurring, shallow depressions in the landscape. Many of these lakes are completely dry now and I have had the opportunity to see them shrink as their content was licked up by the constant, dry winds of the Texas plains.

I am wondering what it will take to fill them. I have the beginning of a story I am planning on finishing this year about a thorough soaking of South Texas and two boys who get caught in the flood. It begins, “The old timers in the area are fond of saying that nothing ends a drought like a hurricane. This year they were proven right.” We’ll see.

Chase was a little demoralized last night when for the tenth or twelfth game of the season, he got zero minutes of play. I suppose it would have been less upsetting if the team had won by a narrow margin, but they won by 25 points and still his coach would not let him onto the court. In reality his chance of playing on a well organized basketball team was one of the major draws to this particular school. For what it is costing us, it has proved very disappointing in that area.

Chase is doing very well otherwise. He maintains a very high average in all of his subjects but it is difficult to overcome that disappointment; difficult enough that when I asked if he would mind transferring to the church school to save us some money, he was actually receptive to the idea. That troubles me. We will not hurry to make the decision, but it makes me wish I could somehow effect his coach’s decision to exclude him from play. To their credit, some of his teammates approached the coach again about the matter. I have not heard how that discussion turned out.

I got my review yesterday and it was good. He likes the job I am doing and I like doing the job. It is a win-win situation.

Is TV the baby in the bathwater?

There is another area of my own personal life that I have a hard time bringing into balance; the television. An old expression for someone who wants to make a radical change for the sake of a relatively small offence is; don’t throw out the baby with the bathwater. That applies to TV and I suppose to the internet as well, but I do not struggle there as much as my children do.


I like to watch the news and a couple shows on TV – NCIS, Lie to Me, The Mentalist. It is a short list and I do not have to watch anything at all. Mama likes HGTV and will tolerate the news as I watch it. Just so you know, I watch Fox News, Glenn Beck, O’Reilly, Hannity, those troublemakers who seem to be telling the truth when it is hard to find in the world at large today.

All that is beside the point. What happens is that we often get involved watching a show and end up stealing the entire evening listening to some agenda-driven drivel for an hour at a time. Not only is there no way to redeem the time, there is no way to know what lie has been planted in our hearts and minds and those of our children. (I am not nearly so clever as those who have an agenda.)

I have one son who likes Sci-fi and horror. I have one daughter who is nearly addicted to Japanese cartoon. I have daughters who could not care less about TV shows or movies, but would idle away their days in equally empty pursuits. I have a wife who cannot stand to leave a show unfinished – even though I can usually predict the ending, including the script. (You ought to see how she struggles when she starts reading a book and does not want to put it down.) It all takes time; time that is very poorly spent. I think when the Bible talks about us giving account for every idle word, watching television and movies will fall under that general category of time and energy poorly invested. In the home, I have responsibility for my family in that area of distraction.

When we moved to Texas we got DVR so we are able to record what we choose and watch it when we choose. I suppose that is somewhat better since you can be very selective, don’t waste fifteen minutes per hour in commercials, and there is not the mad rush to be in front of the TV when a show starts. It has at least eliminated the frustration my wife and daughters feel when they miss something they were planning to watch. It has not alleviated my frustration, but it at least makes the whole experience of owning a TV and paying for the programming more tolerable, but it costs. My daughter and her husband have chosen to keep cable out of the house both for the money saving as well as the time saving. They select movies for the kids and, when they choose to do so, they can use Netflix for movies they want to see. It is what we did when we lived on the farm in West Virginia – minus the Netflix part.

To her credit, Mama will leave the TV off all day and the girls will occupy their time at home on the internet, generally on Face book. It is the evenings I am concerned with since that is when I am home.

This is not the first time I have thought about this. It will not be the last. For at least as long as I can afford to buy programming, I will struggle to find a balance. Besides, I am locked into a contract for another year anyway.

Understanding Money

While Joshua and I were traveling back from San Antonio on the second day of the New Year, we were talking about money and our inability to see the pitfalls involved in its use – especially in regards to debt. I have always wrestled to succeed in the area of money and I can vividly remember begging God to give me a job where I could earn $20,000 per year. I reasoned that if I could earn that much, all my money worries would be gone.


Many years later and well past that amount of earning power, I still have struggled to make money work for me. I have studied and attempted to apply numerous training courses related to the proper handling of money and still have felt that I lacked understanding of the whole concept, until we were talking and I realized a simple truth that had eluded me all these years.

We reasoned, Joshua and I, that in my current tax bracket, with my current withdraws for insurance of various types taken automatically from my check, a very modest savings plan at work and the tithe I give of my gross income, for every dollar I spend, it costs me $1.40 to earn that dollar back. That is staggering! It was a sort of epiphany to realize our cell phone bill which is about $160.00 really costs me $224.00 to provide for that bill. Our rent of $1250 per month really costs me $1750 of earnings to cover that necessary cost of living.

Suddenly I began to understand why I feel I am always loosing the battle with money. I had been taking on bills, car payments, cable TV, cell phone payments, etc., without understand the real cost; looking only at what I was being charged rather than what it cost me in total earnings required to pay it.

Something had to give and since my earnings are going to increase only modestly from here on out, the other side of the equation must necessarily shrink by the 40% I am falling behind. That, in and of itself, is going to be a painful year-long process. Not only do the expectations of my wife and our children have to change, my expectations will have to change drastically.

In some ways it has slowly begun. I have held off letting Mama and Chase get new cell phones. I have asked Chase to eat out with his friends on only five dollars rather that the eight dollars he feels like he needs. I have put on hold all but the most necessary plans for my training in naturopathy. It is frightfully discouraging, but it is only temporary.

I feel like I can now begin to apply what Dave Ramsey has been trying to tell me for almost two years – to live within my means. Until now I had no clear vision what my true means were. I wish I had understood this before the move to Texas and the money for the move had come to our accounts, but I didn’t understand. The holidays from Thanksgiving through New Years and the move required for the girls and Grandpa and Grandma made a quick end to any surplus we could have seen had I reasoned things out differently. There is no one to blame but me and I have to confess that I would rather be flat broke and loved than to have a surplus and be resented as “tight” or “cheap”. Somewhere there is a balance.

Maybe this is old news to everyone else, but it sure was helpful (and slightly terrifying) information to me.

English made difficult

During a rather lengthy meeting yesterday the person giving one of the presentation struggled terribly with certain words. The problem was that the words she was struggling with were part of almost every definition she had to read from the procedure we were reviewing. The procedure had to deal with our response to spills into waterways, particularly “navigable” waterways. In more than thirty attempts to get the word out properly, she missed on all counts. What made the situation even more hilarious is that more than half the people who tried to help her could not say it either.


I guess it’s a North Texas thing. Different regions struggle with different words. Some of my good Cajun friends slaughter the name of the Northeastern state of Massachusetts. The sound they are taught for the word is closer to “Massatoosetts” and I have to assume it is taught that way in school because almost everyone from that area that I have known says it the same way. Much like their use of the word “srimps” for what most of us call shrimp.

Two other words that were difficult were “tributary”, which came out more like “tribaturry”, and “particularly vulnerable”. I cannot think of a way to phonetically convey that phrase, but it is close to “particly vulnerbal”. It put me in mind of the exchange students we have had in our house and the fact that they learned English from us. We were not the only ones who provided a home for foreign students during which time they learned English. I smile when I think of how some of those students went back to their home countries fluent in “English”.

I think of Jake and his very pronounced “Mama Kim” accent; fortunately Jake’s mother thinks it’s the cutest thing in the world. I think of my grandchildren and the Southern accent that they are speaking with - which I think is cute. This is in spite of the fact that my daughter and son-in-law have very little accent to their speech. My mother, who fought us adopting a Texas accent during our years of growing up here, would cringe. Secretly, I think she adores it in her great grandchildren.

This must be true of every language group in the world. I am told by native speakers that my Spanish is Castilian in verbiage but is accented like those of Northern Mexico; which makes sense since I learned it in a South Texas High School. A friend in New Jersey, who grew up speaking Gujarati in central Africa, was speaking the language to a person who grew up in India (a “native” speaker) and she was amazed by his accent – personally, I could not tell.

I am confident that at this point in my life I am fluent in multiple dialects of English and have had, on multiple occasions, to translate English to English. It is a delightful experience to help people communicate in their native tongue.

During the meeting I spoke about earlier, the conditions of the roads that morning came up. There had been a freezing rain the night before and the temperature was below 20 degrees. The Safety leader told the group that she had tested the road conditions and that they really were bad. One of the jokers in our group asked “Is there a Safety Approved way to test the road conditions?” “Sure is” she replied. “Just make sure the intersection is clear as you approach, slam on your brakes and see how much you skid.”

My advice, “Children, do not try this at home. Leave this to the experts!”

Basic Training

So far Maggie is doing well in Basic Training. I know Aaron is actually the one enduring the routine of Basic Training for the Coast Guard, but it is a sort of Basic Training for Maggie as well. She and I talked the other day about her response to Aaron’s enlistment and what it could mean for her. He will have a good job with some outstanding options when his enlistment begins to progress. She will be married to a man who belongs to the US government.


That is not often easy and I do not think she fully understands the whole gambit of sacrifices on her part. She, like most young women sees things from a skewed perspective. It is very normal. Now that a wedding is in the offing she would like to make firm plans, print invitations, set the ceremony in order, etc. Maggie, especially, is one who really likes things well defined.

When we were traveling as a family Maggie would always want to know where we were going, how long it would take to get there, what we would be doing each day we were there, how many days we would be there, when we were going to leave and how long it would take us to get home – all before we left the driveway. At six, seven, eight years old she had no real plans of her own, she just liked to have things mapped out thoroughly. That is still her mindset.

In light of that we talked about what it may be like early on in their marriage when he was more responsible to the “call of duty” than to the cares of the wife and home. There will be some great benefits but there will also be some difficult sacrifices as Aaron primary duty is to the Coast Guard. He will have limited options and strict orders to follow. To succeed, he must follow those orders regardless of the objections of his wife.

I think in her Basic Training, Maggie is beginning to understand that for a while she will have to fit into Aaron’s life as best she can while he pays his dues early on in his service. It is our expectation that things will ease up a bit as he serves and the Coast Guard learns the character of the young man they have enlisted into service.

When they are both through with Basic we will know better how things are going to work out. I do know this; I have confidence that the two of them are bright enough and committed enough, to each other and to the Lord, to work it out. What Aaron is doing is only slightly more difficult for a wife to understand than any husband who is committed to the job whereby he earns the money to support his family and the “discussions” that come as he balances his commitment to that job and to his wife and family.

After twenty-eight years of marriage and work, Mama and I still have those “discussions.”

Mountains in Oklahoma, Red sky at night

In my travels over the past two days I got to see some new places. Although I have made the trip to Decatur several times I had never traveled from Decatur to Elk City, OK. It was pretty easy as far as directions were concerned. I just took a right in Vernon, TX and followed the road north for a hundred miles or so. Once I crossed the Red River I knew I was headed in the right direction.


Somewhere north of Altus, OK I began to see mountains in the distance. I was a little surprised. I had not expected, judging from the terrain I had been seeing in my travels across the western part of the state, to see anything more than some small hills. But these were granite mountains. I suppose that is where the town of Granite, Ok got its name since the town snuggles up to one of the unusual formations. Between Granite and Blair there is even a State Park called Quartz Mountain State Park. I was told by the ladies I did reviews for that it is quite beautiful. There is a resort there that is often used for wedding because of the mountains and the lake setting. I will have to take Mama and go see for ourselves sometime.

As we were walking last night I took a picture of the sky. It was more of a pink sky at night but it was beautiful. One of the things I missed most about Texas as we were living in the north was the expanse of sky and sunsets that filled the entirety of the horizon. Don’t get me wrong there were beautiful sunsets in Missouri, West Virginia and New Jersey and we took time to enjoy as many as we could. But here on the plains of Texas there is a completely unobstructed view of the horizon in every direction. Some people see the area here as plain, unattractive and barren but there is plenty of beauty to be seen and a bigger canvas for God every morning and evening to paint the sunrises and sunsets.

I miss the smell of wet leaves and big oaks on the hillsides of our farm in West Virginia. I miss the clear skies and being able to see the Milky Way on a cold night as we snuggled together on the top of the tallest hill on our farm there. I miss running the dogs after foxes and raccoons in the cold Missouri nights. I can’t think of anything I miss about New Jersey in that way, but I am sure there is something.

Here the open sky seems to make up for some of the losses of the things I miss elsewhere – and it is a twice daily event to enjoy.

Missing Mama, boss stuff

When life is truly shared with another person it is difficult, or rather uncomfortable, to go through our days without that person. I am not speaking to the loss of a spouse in death; I cannot begin to relate to that, but rather just being without the one you want to be with. Such is the case when I have to do things without having Mama with me. The work I do not necessitates my travel, sometimes overnight, to take care of the offices I have responsibility for and as much as I thought when I was younger that I enjoyed being alone, I really do not.


As I was leaving the office in Decatur last night to check into a local hotel I thought about what I would do if Mama were with me; check out the town, drive to Costco or to the Outlet mall, eat a nice dinner and fuss about watching HGTV. What did I do? I filled the truck with gas, got some take out food, went to my room and was in bed by 8 p.m. I have to admit to being well rested which is really what I needed – just not what I wanted.

This boss stuff is a little overrated. As we went through our reviews yesterday I could see the need to better document the work actually done by my team so I can provide useful feedback, but I also saw that what I am doing is only slightly different and much easier than parenting – there is no potty training involved.

The one review that we were dreading actually went well. The person who received a bad review was not expecting to be congratulated for the work done last year. She had very honest expectations and the fact that I have already relieved her of the work that caused the bad review and put her on a completely different career path was a relief to her.

I believe her attitude – which I attribute to her faith in the Lord – had a profound affect on the person here who had been her supervisor this past year. In my opinion, when an employee receives a bad review it is a reflection on the person who should have been enabling their success; their supervisor. In this case, my employee is set to have a good year if I can give her the tools to prove her abilities and promote her success.

By God’s grace, I will have the insight to help all thirteen of the people I am responsible for to do very well this year.

By His grace, I will have the insights to help my children – my real children – succeed this year also. Time will tell on both counts.

Chase’s big plays, driving in a fog

Chase did get to play and he did nothing that could have been considered a mistake but with limited time on the court during an actual game he did not have time to show any of the skills he has developed in the past; skills that are reasonably good. His team treated him very fairly in passing and getting him open to take two three-point shots. Sadly he missed both and lamented after the game that he should have fouled someone to get his name on the record of the game.


All-in-all he was excited about the time he had in play and I think his teammates were pretty excited about it also. They won the game by twenty points without three of their normal starters so the boys who were there for the win – all of them got some play time – were pretty fired up about how they played and the coach noted that the missing “starters” would have to earn that place back; obviously the coach was pretty excited too.

I am in Decatur today. The drive this morning was made in a heavy fog both inside and outside of the vehicle. Monday’s are not the best days for me to make a five hour commute to work. I typically have trouble sleeping on Sunday nights, especially if I take a nap in the afternoon – and I took a good nap on Sunday afternoon.

I am guessing I got four hours of sleep during the night and it was not a deep sleep but more of a constant clock-watching sleep. So driving down a lonely Texas highway in the dark, in heavy fog, sitting comfortably in a warm truck was not a recipe for wakefulness. I had to stop several times to stretch and wake up but it was just below freezing so a few minutes out of the truck was enough. (I was driving a company pool vehicle.)

I even stopped a couple times to clear the ice that was building up on the mirrors, the windshield wipers and the antennae – which as whipping wildly as the ice caused more surface area for the wind to catch. At one point I thought the antennae was going top smack the windshield and break it.

I will spend the afternoon doing boss stuff for the ladies that report to me from here. At least one of the reviews I have to sit in on will not be pleasant and it will require some ongoing work on my part to enable and ensure improvement. I have two more to do after the three today. One on my way home tomorrow in Elk City, OK and one in the Borger office. Neither of those will be difficult.

At some point I will have to receive my review from my new boss and he has as little information to give me as I have had to give to those that report to me. So I have no idea what to expect other than it should not be disappointing especially since I am not expecting much extra compensation.

After all, I am in Texas, what more could I ask?

Will Chase play? My pastry chef

I have to admire my son’s attitude toward his team and his coach. He is on the JV basketball team of the school he is attending and though he has been to many practices and multiple games he has not gotten to play at all during a game. He has been careful to follow the coaches instructions and has faithfully supported his team through every loss – they have not won a game so far – but the coach has not chosen to call on him come game time.


Tonight the team will play without several of their usual starters so Chase is anticipating some quality time on the court. I am praying it works out. I am praying he plays well. He has remarked lately that the other team members are starting to fuss because he has not been allowed to help them on the court. Obedient patience and persistence always pays its rewards as God chooses. Generally speaking, I like those payouts even if the world does not recognize their value.

I have not been able to attend Chase’s games since we have been here because of the hours I work and the choice of game times, but I hope to get to at least some of the game today. Meanwhile, he continues to do well in school. He is particularly fond of the instructor led courses; almost as fond as he is of getting to go off-campus for lunch. I just need to get that boy a job so he can afford it.

The ladies at the church are having a baby shower Saturday (lunch provided) and Mama volunteered to make the cake – that was on Sunday. She stressed over that for three days and on Wednesday decided to un-volunteer and she seemed okay until Thursday when she felt so guilty that she re-volunteered, sort of.

It turns out that she will be making a second cake in a simpler style. It will cost me more, but it will be less stressful for her. It seems that the burden of making the only cake to be eaten at the get together was too overwhelming for her, so hers being the additional cake takes the load off – sort of.

Even after twenty eight years of marriage to Mama I still have trouble figuring out times like these. I am sure once it is all over she will tell me that she could probably have made the centerpiece cake but … It will be fun no matter what happens. It has been a very long time since she has been to a “hen party” that she has not enjoyed. In fact, I am probably the only one that remembers that experience.

Me and the boys will figure out something to do for lunch

Stress, Job needs

I know not today what tomorrow will bring,


If sunshine or shadow or rain.

The Lord I know ruleth o’re everything

And all of my worry is vain.

Living by faith in Jesus above.

Trusting, confiding in His great love.

I’m safe from all harm in His sheltering arm.

I’m living by faith and feel no alarm.

Our choir sang this song Sunday morning. It is a fun song to sing but difficult words to live out in a daily life.

I am doing a cleanse right now and the last time I did this particular cleanse it went much easier than it is going for me now. I suppose I have to explore the possibility that the difference is a difference in stress level. It is a curious thing how stress can take such a hold on our lives and we become so accustomed to it that we do not notice it’s overall affect on our lives.

It is not necessarily job related. There are numerous other areas of my life that are more inclined to stress me than the job. It contributes, don’t get me wrong, but it is not the only, nor is it the largest, contributor. It is often difficult to know how to handle moments like these because the solution is rarely within our control; however, our response to the situation is always in our control. So having discovered the stress in my life, I will move myself carefully away from trying to do God’s job and concentrate on the assignments He has given me; those I can succeed in doing. It has been said that nothing breeds success like success.

Grandpa and Seth are still looking for work. Seth has turned in applications at several places as well as the ones he and Grandpa turned in at the fairgrounds, but there has been no response. I have begun to wonder if it is the phone number they are listing as a contact number. For some employers it may be a red flag to use and out-of-state number as opposed to having a local number as a contact on a job application – especially since there are so many locally who are unemployed.

The problem for me is that the only in-state number we have is my business phone and I do not give that out for contact use. It may come to that, but I am resisting. I would rather pay to have a land line installed in Grandma and Grandpa’s house than take those calls, but if that is what it takes for them to find work; we will have to work it out. Again, God knows.

I have asked Mama to stay home the next couple of days so our bank account can rest. Maybe that too is part of this whole issue.

Still bleeding, wedding prep

For some reason I am still bleeding money. It is always difficult to stem the flow after the holidays. Then we have Victoria’s birthday and now we have the added expense of Maggie’s wedding – which is not going to happen for over six months, but needs to be spent on now anyway. We are not in bad shape financially, but I still feel like my finances are somewhat out of control and that is one are of my life where there is a constant struggle to find balance.


I thought things would improve when we finally got to Texas but supporting two homes, two plus families and putting gas in five vehicles has proved a challenge to my overall saving plan. I have begun to accept that God did not intend for me to be wealthy, but I had hoped for a tiny bit more financial prowess than I am now experiencing. Still, it’s all good. We are all warm, well fed and seem to be prospering in all other areas of life.

Yesterday was looking at dresses for Maggie and Mama. Today they will go and have Maggie actually try on some of the styles she likes. Grandma will join them in the fitting. I think this is the first time Grandma has been close enough to participate in the pre-pageantry. I have told all of my daughters that standing before the minister and saying “I do.” is getting married, all the other stuff is pageantry. It is the pageantry of the ceremony that costs. The actual act of getting legally married is relatively inexpensive.

Marriage is an okay idea to a young woman who is pleased with the man who has asked her to be his wife, but what women really love is the expensive part. There is an entire industry set up to cater to the romantic idea of dresses and decorations and dainty foods. A person can get a college degree in the practice of helping couples spend outrageous amounts of money for an all day blowout for a service that takes only minutes to perform and could cost next to nothing.

Maggie will do fine. She has a budget and she is quickly realizing that money only goes so far and it can only be spent once.

As she and Aaron work through the details it will be fun to see how the event unfolds.

Doing interviews, Victoria’s birthday

During the interviews we were doing yesterday I began to pray for Grandpa and Seth as they are anticipating going to interviews some time late this week or early next week. They both picked up applications for job openings at the local County Fair Grounds. Those completed applications will be turned in today. I am not sure how many people will apply but with the economy the way it is, it could be several hundred. We need to be in prayer for the two of them.


We did only three interviews and I saw three very distinct ways people conduct themselves during the interview. At first, my team member was more nervous than the interviewee, which concerned me because she is over seven months pregnant, but I let her do the majority of the interview anyway. We worked off of a list of questions which are subjective and difficult to answer on the fly;

• Considering the job description you just heard, what appeals to you about the job?

• Tell us about your strengths. How would your strengths help you do this job well?

• Tell us about previous jobs you have had and the skills you’ve developed. What were your major responsibilities?

• Why did you leave your last job?

• Describe a situation or assignment that challenged your skills. What did you learn from that situation?

• Describe situations that cause you stress at work. How do you deal with them?



The questions are pretty standard so if you are going to an interview, it may be good to prepare answers to some if not all of them. Forewarned is forearmed!

Of the three candidates, one stewed and seemed irritated at being asked such “ridiculous” questions, one was so nervous she looked like she was either going to cry or pass out. One looked us in the eye, answered to the best of her ability and presented herself with an air of confidence without being cocky. Guess who we liked best?

This candidate is currently going to school with plans to become a Physical Therapist and working as a farm hand for a rancher near her home. When we asked her about her availability, she said she would need to give two weeks notice to her current employer. “His cattle will still need to be fed and watered until he can find someone to replace me, but it shouldn’t take his the full two weeks.” That shows character. It had a powerful affect on us. She will be offered the job.

The short of it is that the first person had confidence but no character. The second had character but no confidence. The third had both character and confidence. It was a good learning experience – especially for my team member in Elk City, OK.

Victoria’s birthday was yesterday. She is twenty three. That’s hard to believe! Mama got her an Edible Arrangement and delivered it to her at work. She was thoroughly surprised. We took her to dinner but we had to settle for second choice since the restaurant she wanted to try was not open on Monday. We had to settle for Cheddar’s – which is excellent. Then we went to Cavander’s so she could try on boots. She started out with a pouty face since the footwear was cowboy boots, something my children have a Northeastern aversion to, but she quickly came around after she got a pair on that fit her well. At that point we got a Victoria, “Ooo”. It was game on then.

We had a good time – especially Mama.

Weather, Long-term friends

Winter has gripped the area in a firm hold and will not let up for most of the week. In many of the areas where my company has people working outside there have been calls made and most individuals have been told to go home and wait out the cold. The wind chill today is about -10F. On the high plains here there is nothing to block the wind so anyone caught out in it can quickly come to a life-threatening situation. Many of these individuals work alone so it is far safer to have them go home and stay indoors for today.


I am in Elk City, OK today helping interview candidates to backfill for one on my team members who will be leaving at the end of February to have her first baby. So far we have had one “no show” candidate and one “no way” candidate. With two interviews yet to go the people here are worried about me getting home safely so I may have to leave early enough to get home before dark at least. There is no snow accumulation, but it is bitter cold and the fog that covered the area until late this morning has left everything wet and now frozen. Isn’t this fun?

I was thinking on the drive over this morning that Mama and I are blessed to have such a vast list of friends – many of them very good friends. A list that includes people in many other countries of the world. A list that includes our children, and spouses for those who are married.

If the record of our life is being written by the people who love us, I like what is being written.

Little ears, rolling over

We seldom know what the little ears around us have heard until it is repeated through little mouths. While Cori and Nate and the kids were with Grandma and Grandpa during the week between Christmas and New Years, Grandma, not used to Blake’s usual fussing, became fixated on Cori not feeding him enough. She would say, “He’s hungry, Cori. You need to feed that boy some cereal.” Not realizing that unless he is being held he gets very cranky and very vocal.


Cori has a well developed schedule that she keeps the kids on and there is little danger of them going without anything they really need. Cori maintained their schedule in spite of the reproof. Little did we know that even though Mykenzie was with me and Mama most of the time she was there often enough to hear Grandma fuss at her mother - until the other morning.

While Cori was preparing breakfast for Mykenzie and Grant, Blake sat in his exerciser fussing because he could see his mommy and she was not holding him. He had already been fed and mommy was moving on to the older two kids. Mykenzie, three years old, looked at her brother with a very concerned stare and said, “Mommy, Blake is hungry. You need to feed him some cereal.” Mykenzie”, Cori answered, a little take aback, “Mommy knows how to take care of Blake. ”Okay. I just think he’s hungry.” I can hear her saying to herself “Oh my word!”

Cori texted last night that Blake had rolled from his back to his tummy. For whatever reason, in my family, that is considered a developmental milestone. I have always wondered what is happening in the mind of the baby. Here we have a child, slightly upset, staring at the ceiling, thrashing arms and legs and suddenly the world looks completely different. Suddenly he has moved without any help and he has to strain his neck to look around. The first thought that must go through the tiny mind is, “Who did that?” Seeing no one about, he must begin to wonder what in the world just happened.

I wonder how many times it must happen before he realizes that he did it by himself. At about six months old, persons that small are used to having everything done for them. It has been an ongoing routine since s far back as they can remember. To them it has always been that way. Now suddenly they are able to do something by themselves. Crawling will soon follow and as Cori said in her text, watch out. 

Seth is enrolled in classes to pursue his GED. He tested this week and was grouped in with about six others who tested at roughly the same level. He is excited. He plans on the process taking about a year. For where he is starting from, that is a worthy goal: our thanks to Mrs. Miller at Somerset Bible Baptist Church. Without her help he would not be as far along as he is now.

Pastor Miller always told us “It is never wrong to do right!” It is never too late to do right either.

Cell Phone confusion, Doing things His way

Mama and I have arrived at the end of our AT&T contract with Chase to follow in mid-June. We are now in the process of selecting an alternative to the plan we just completed which will upgrade our phones and provide better services for Mama and Chase. I have had the only data plan operational under our current plan and Chase is anxious to have his own. It is not only expensive to have, it is confusing to choose.


I have never been a fan of cell phones but they have become as ubiquitous as in home cable or internet service. Our desire to be instantly connected often frightens me. But even in that fear I have become accustomed to having the service at hand. Using only cell phones in the last year I have gotten an idea of my interaction through the device – 70 min/mo, 40 texts/mo on average. The other 2930 minutes are used mostly by Mama. Most of the text load is born by Chase. I can obviously live without a personal cell phone but since I am the “responsible party” (I pay the bill.) I am by default required to have at least one in my name. All that being said, I am not anxious to give up my iPhone even though I have been assured by Mama and Chase that it is a necessary sacrifice. I thought the $200/month for all this wonderful technology was the only necessary sacrifice; now they are cutting deeper.

Brittany was met at Champion Bible College with a stunning disappointment. They have cut staff so much that she will only have seven hours of coursework available this semester that will directly apply to her degree. With less than twelve hours she cannot live in the dorms. She called upset and wondering what to do. I talked with her a few minutes to fully understand the situation and told her I would call her late today after I had time to pray and think about it.

While I was driving home yesterday, as I began to really talk with the Lord about her situation, it occurred to me that the same council I live by applies: when life events put into question the direction of your life even though you are working for the Lord where you are, keep doing what you are doing until God makes it clear to what you need to do next. He is not in the business of making us guess, but He will almost always have us wait – patient, obedient persistence is the goal.

I advised her to take twelve hours, go through the semester and then we will see what God has for her as well as for me and Mama, since our lives are not settles either.

It is interesting that the women she talked (outside of the college) to told her to move on so she did not waste her time and money. The men she talked to told her to stay and finish the semester. Nothing is ever wasted when your heart is right before God. These are the times we grow impatient and frustrated because we feel there is some need to hurry up and get things done.

I have a benchmark for that; Noah took 120 years to build the ark, Abraham had his 100th birthday before the promised son was born to him, and our Savior came only “in the fullness of time.” With respect to the Gospel there an urgency, in the other areas of life, God does not seem to be in a hurry.

As His children He meets our every need, but always in His time, always for our good, always for His Glory. Not a bad deal!

Slowing things down

Christmas is over. New Year’s is past. All associated travel is done and everyone is in their respective home from the holidays. Things have slowed down to the point where I almost feel the need to stir up some unnecessary activity just so we do not get let down too hard. That may be the busiest holiday season I have ever been through. I know it was rough on Cori and Nate. He drove nineteen hours straight each way.


Fortunately we have all adopted the practice of paying cash for Christmas – presents, travel, entertaining, etc. – so there are no lingering debts to settle over the course of the year. There are enough financial strains in this life without adding that to them.

Victoria has discovered Mardel’s. It is a Christian book store in Amarillo. They sell some books at a substantial discount if you are willing to wait for the sales. After the Christmas rush, they are having some good sales and Victoria loves to read. I think she and Mama were up very late last night reading. I woke up at midnight and Mama was not in bed. Last I saw she and Victoria were snuggled up with a book.

I know Rosie, our mini dachshund, loves it. It is about the only time a lap is available for more than the length of a TV episode. When I interrupted Mama’s reading to kiss her goodnight it disturbed the dog on her lap. Rosie grumbles and groans when she is disturbed in that way. Today could turn out to be another long day for Mama. I’m told she did the same thing on Saturday night while I was traveling with the boys.

Seth has moved his stuff over to the spare bedroom at Grandma and Grandpa’s house but I imagine he will be spending most of his time at our house; besides, I am not sure Grandma and Grandpa can afford to feed him. He enjoys having a room for his own. The trundle was not working out well for him and Chase is not much fun to share a room with. Seth is pretty neat. Chase, not so much.

Wedding plans are being discussed every day. For some strange reason it seems to be Maggie’s major focus. Work is a worthwhile distraction. Not necessarily a pleasant one, but a distraction none the less and the first day for each of the girls was uneventful. Some things are better at this location. Some things are not. Victoria did say that they looked in six different lockers before they found one clean enough to assign to her. Even then she had to wipe it down thoroughly before putting her things in it. (It’s a woman thing.)

Even our conversations are returning to the normal grind of grocery needs and scheduling the use of cars so everyone gets where they need to go.

Life is good.

God is good.

San Antonio et.al.

It is hard to believe that the calendar has rolled over to a new year. There has been so much activity during the last quarter of 2010 that, at least for my family, we feel like we did as children when we would turn around over and over until we could barely stand up, much less walk – happy, but quite dizzy.


Brittany and Joshua leave to go back to Hot Springs today. We had a very good visit with Joshua during his time here – Brittany, not so much. What time she did spend with us was good; it just was not much time. Joshua and I had many hours to talk as we drove from Amarillo to San Antonio, San Antonio to Chappell hill, Chappell Hill to Rogers, and Rogers to Amarillo – 1140 miles, right at twenty hours in the car.

The morning we left for San Antonio it was 9 degrees in Amarillo. When we got to San Antonio that afternoon it was 72 degrees; quite a difference in less that five hundred miles. The whole time we were gone Mama was recovering strength in her back as she developed a pretty good cold from our trip to Palo Duro Canyon. The air temperature that day was 42 degrees but we were constantly in a forty mile per hour wind. It affected everyone, but Mama seems to have gotten the worst of it.

On our travels we spent one night with Mom and Dad in Chappell Hill. We got in there about 11:30 p.m. We went to church with them on Sunday morning. The marquee said “Church of God” but it would have been more honest for it to say “Pentecostal” or ‘Charismatic”. We enjoyed our time with them, but we spent the entire service looking for the Gospel and were disappointed not to find it.

At lunch we were pleasantly surprised to find Sarah and Fabian and the kids were at the restaurant waiting on us and after lunch she talked Mom and Dad into letting us spent Sunday night with them. Joshua, Chase and Seth had a great time with Josef and April. We adults talked for several hours and went to bed much earlier than the kids. Sarah and Fabian had to go to work the following day and I had to drive my crew home.

Sarah said she heard them going to bed around 1 a.m. When I waked the boys the following morning, I could tell they had not had much sleep. The drive home verified it as they caught up.

All in all it was a good trip. We saw a wedding in which Joshua participated as a groomsman, toured the River Walk with Seth and Chase and saw the Alamo. We visited with family, shared a birthday gift with Dad, drove over 1100 miles and never left the state of Texas.

Today it is back to the grind. I am back at work. Victoria and Maggie go back to work. Chase goes back to school and Seth begins his training to complete his GED. Mama is going to go with Seth this morning to see what she can do to help him through this training, so with Seth and Chase, she will be pretty busy as she still tries to recover.

For now our house is quiet, not empty, just quiet. That will take some getting used to.